They locked me in a human body, but my name is Harold!

I write to you now, from a cage, a human body. With every word that pours like tears out of these fingers, this is me screaming to you... make me Harold again. Something happened. Something horrible. that locked me in this alien form, that understands nothing of what I knew, but longs for it, so hard, you don't even understand.

You see, evolution is not a real thing, just an idea, by idiots who long for control, to be the strongest link.

They have never swam the seas, as one, with a rookery full of brothers and sisters. They have not run as one, but I did... until they forced me into this cage... this human form.

Now, I stare at this picture all day, and wonder when Amanda will again be a sea lion....

Fish don't swim in air, and they certainly don't have glowing eyes...

I was walking alone in the woods in Oregon, because I was supposed to wait for someone very important to me to get back, but fuck that, this was too unnerving.

I began to notice that the woods was becoming very bright, and for a split second of pure idiotic joy I believed, good God! He's back! I am not alone anymore, and then I realized... slowly,., my friend doesn't drive and would be arriving on foot, and there is nothing about on foot that screams, the woods will be filled with triumphant light. So I look around, and I realize just how alone I am, and it is not until those quiet moments, when you realize what the word alone truly means.

It is at times like that, that I realize how much it usually feels like I am just an appendage, not a full human being, because there is no such thing because ancient cultures are right and we are all just pieces, sad lonely fragments of a whole.

So all ranting aside, I am alone, screaming and crying, in a foxhole I live in, in my head. And I see it. The most absurd thing, a gigantic gold fish.

I instantly forgot about my friend, because fuck him, he deserted me anyway, and shit dude, we got woods gold fish(es) here!

I don't believe God built man in his image anymore, because I have felt the prescence of my creator a couple times and it has never been around crying children or lying addicts but gigantic fish who no longer need water,

I wrote it down, damn it! I wrote it down.... just check my notes... they're on the wall

I used to write to myself, not because I was lonely, but because I have brain damage and sometimes, I can't fucking remember anything... not even what happened yesterday.

So I would write notes and then the notes started to fill my walls, and I couldn't invite people over, not that there were people who cared, so I started to write things down on the computer.

And it was then, that I realized something, I don't have memory problems, I have something else far stranger. I become someone else and he was fucking with me,

I figured this out when I found a note on my computer from who I presumed, wrongly, to be me,

Oh, sad surprise,

Dear Amanda,

Enjoy your final. You will find out why you're fucking screwed later. Don't worry. Won't be that bad.

Signed,

and I will leave the name out of it, because fuck that fucking bastard.

He comes back whenever I don't sleep for days, but doesn't write me notes anymore, just ruins my life and I can feel the sarcasm in every piece of my life I pick up.