Have you ever forgotten how to speak?

I had a friend in college, named Jess, who is the only other person who I have ever encountered who has experienced this. Have you ever forgotten how to speak?

Now, I don't mean figuratively, like you were silenced, I mean have you ever for a second forgotten how to make your tongue form FUCKING WORDS. Who does that?

Me, for one, and others who have severe anxiety? No, let's call it a problem caused by deep introspection.

So, if you haven't experienced this nightmare, let me describe it for you,

Imagine, you're seven years old, sitting in class, afraid to be called on

Because they might realize you started thinking about the word the and how the tongue learned to make those sounds, or what the means, and BAM.,

GONE

You feel you have forgotten, how to make words, but you are thinking them,

So surely, you haven't lost your GODDAMN MIND

But, it is not polite to interrupt, so you must sit. AND WAIT.... to figure out if you're still capable of human speach.

And that is part of why I do this, so I can tell you, whoever is listening... or just me,

how much I appreciate the ability to not forget.

Stress on an unsound mind

Some of us, humanity I mean, have a unique talent,

If you want to call it that.

I call it a curse.

Now, I do anyway.

I used to think it was a talent.

We have the ability to

sometimes,

be

In two places, at once.

I used to think it was great,

like living,

In the past, present, future, at once,

E x i s t i n g....

Simultaneously.... in 3 worlds, reality, memory, and expectation,

But, then I realized I am not God,

and I have the ability, to

F R A

CTURE

fracture, I mean, such a hard word to say...

and then I end up leaving pieces of myself places.

Places, I go alone, in my mind....

And... I am starting to think that might be dangerous,

Upon sober reflection.

Tell me, what you think, or leave me, to talk to myself.

My mom mailed me a bird cage

But they have locked down the Eugene mission, and I can't buy birds. So I am using the cage as my mask. Maybe, if I smile enough the birds will fly in.